


Promises and Partings

by ShepGoesWhat



Series: Things Unnoticed, Words Unsaid [3]
Category: Mass Effect Trilogy
Genre: F/M, Mass Effect 2, Post-Mass Effect 2: Arrival
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-05-20
Updated: 2017-05-20
Packaged: 2018-11-02 19:17:51
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,330
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10951026
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ShepGoesWhat/pseuds/ShepGoesWhat
Summary: Shepard and Garrus talk about the events of Arrival.





	Promises and Partings

Shepard woke to a feeling that something had gone horribly wrong. She smelled disinfectant and blinked against bright lights as she fought to remember. _Aratoht. Proof of the Reaper threat. Kenson's eyes!_ She rolled off the bed and reached for her gun, her hands grasping at nothing. She'd rather die than become one of Harbinger's mindless husks!

"Settle down, Commander. You're safe and on the Normandy." Chakwas' voice filled the air, and Shepard stilled. Her eyes cleared to show her the Normandy's med bay even as her mind filled in the gaps. Right. She'd delivered her report to Hackett, and then Chakwas had insisted on running some tests. "Just a routine examination. No scalpel and nothing invasive," the doctor had promised. She must have fallen asleep. "How are you feeling, Commander?" Chakwas asked, looking her over.

Shepard stood and winced at the pain in her knees. "I'm fine. Just thought I was somewhere else for a second. Sorry." She gave Chakwas a reassuring smile and helped herself a cup of coffee. She took a long drink, and warmth coursed through her veins. _Not dead then. And more importantly, not indoctrinated._ She let out a grateful sigh. "How long was I out?" she asked.

"It's been four hours since you talked with Admiral Hackett. A number of the crew have been by to visit you. I shooed them out after reassuring them you were just sleeping. Your cybernetic implants seem to have rejected whatever drugs they injected into your system, though if you feel any aftereffects, you're to report back here immediately." Shepard relaxed, glad that Kenson's scientists had failed.

"Got it. Thanks Doctor." She gulped the last of her coffee and headed to the mess hall. It was late into the night cycle, and to her relief, the mess was empty. She peered hopefully into the refrigerator, poked at a greyish gelatinous cube, before grabbing a couple ration bars from the cupboard. She popped the last bite in her mouth as she strolled into her cabin, and immediately began choking when a hand flashed out to grab her arm. 

"Oh crap. Shepard." Garrus rubbed her back, as if trying to comfort her. Shepard waved him off, grabbing the water on her desk. Once the coughing fit passed, she asked, "What're you doing here?"

Garrus' mandibles flicked, and he ducked his head. "Sorry, I didn't mean to intrude. Or scare you. I was, uh, waiting. I mean, I thought you wouldn't mind--" 

She smiled at his rambling and closed the distance between them. She linked her hands behind his neck and touched her brow to his. "I'm happy you're here, Garrus."

He leaned against her touch and wrapped his arms around her waist, a low rumble rising from his chest. "I was worried," he said softly. "EDI wouldn't tell us where you'd gone, or why you didn't bring backup. After two days without hearing anything..." His arms tightened slightly. "What happened, Shepard? Are you okay?"

Her usual "I'm fine" was halfway out of her lips before she stopped. This was _Garrus_. They'd promised. No lies. "I'm... I'm not okay." The truth cracked something inside her, and her body shook with grief, rage, fear, frustration, everything she'd suppressed the past couple days. Sudden tears welled in her eyes, and she bit her cheek, forcing them back. She tried to push Garrus away. He didn't budge. "I can't... I tried. _I tried so hard._ " The words seemed to drain her of strength, and her arms fell listlessly to her side. She couldn't help it then. She leaned into his chest and cried. 

Garrus watched her with worried eyes but kept quiet. She couldn't help the words from forming, forcing their way out like spitting out poison. "It wasn't a military camp. They didn't even wear armor! I snuck around like an idiot, hiding behind crates and tables, thinking I could save them. I wanted to save them! Even at the very end, I thought I'd find a way." Still shaking, she pulled out of his grasp and wrapped her arms around herself. She locked her red-rimmed eyes on his cool blue ones and took a breath. "Garrus, I killed three hundred _thousand_ people today. I destroyed an entire batarian system."

She threw the words at him like a challenge, daring him to tell her she wasn't a monster, to offer bland platitudes that meant and changed nothing. "I know," he replied calmly. She furrowed her brows and blinked. "What?" 

"When Joker got your signal, we were at our stations in case something had gone wrong. So, it was pretty hard for anyone with eyes to miss the massive asteroid that was suddenly pulling us into its gravitational field. To borrow a phrase from Zaeed, it was 'Arma-fucking-geddon.' Tali had to pull power from half the systems to get us enough speed to jump ahead of it."

Shepard opened her mouth to say something, but Garrus cut her off and continued. "All of us saw Hackett come aboard, and we pieced two and two together. Jack looked like she was going to send him flying, but just glared and stomped away. Though if he had tried to leave with you right then, I'm pretty sure Kasumi and Thane were in the shadows ready to dissuade him of that." He took her hand and twined his three fingers with her five. "We'd follow you into hell, Shepard, and watch your back every step of the way." 

She leaned her head against his chest and closed her eyes. He wrapped an arm protectively around her. "The Reapers are coming." He squeezed her hand. "I know." 

She shook her head, rubbing her forehead against his plates. "They'd be here now if I hadn't destroyed the Alpha Relay. When Joker came, they were minutes from surging through the other side. I traded three hundred thousand lives, for what? A few months? A year maybe?" She shuddered and pressed closer to him. "And the worst part is, I'd do it again."

He put his chin on her head, and a low, comforting sound rose from his chest. They stood like that for a long while, Garrus with his arms around her, trying to shield her from things he couldn't see, and Shepard almost letting herself forget. He was about to suggest they go to bed when she broke the silence. "I'm going back to Earth."

Garrus tensed and raised his head to look at her. "Shepard, come on. I know I said we'd follow you into hell, but I didn't mean political hell." 

She gave a small, bitter laugh. "I know, and that's why you're not coming." Garrus stepped back, and his mandibles flared. He looked like she'd just struck him. Shepard continued, "I need you on Palaven. The Reapers are coming, Garrus. They're here. Our war's already started, and everyone still has their head in the sand. The batarians will be calling for blood, and we can't have the Hegemony fighting the Alliance at a time like this. I have to go back, and I won't be able to help from a cell." 

He shook his head, and she gripped his wrist, forcing him to meet her eyes. "You have to warn the turians. Help them prepare. Please. I can't do this without you."

He saw the pleading in her eyes. His subharmonics wavered between sadness and frustration. _Don't make me do this, Shepard. Don't go._ He put his hand over hers and held back a sigh. With confidence he didn't feel, he promised, "If the Reapers want Palaven, I'll make sure they fight for it." 

He gently touched his brow against hers, and she pressed back against him. She slid her arms around him, feeling the tension slowly bleed away, and traced the scarred side of his face with a hand before bringing his head down for a kiss. If she was going back to Earth and he to Palaven, they had some goodbyes to say first.


End file.
